I'm coming out...

bluewaves_aiz
06282011

I feel like I'm a gay, coming out of my closet, facing harsh reality for being who I am, but gives me peace at my heart.

I'm not proud of what I did, and I know this is not the best situation. But I'm unexpectedly happy that I came out. I'm at peace, really.

Of Maturity

11282012

bluewaves_aiz

Days are rolling and I have this thoughts swirling in my mind about nature and stuffs. 

And when I plan to write it down, it pops, voila,.. nothing tips...

Life's unfair

bluewave_aiz
09112013

I feel suffocated for the longest time already, not with my hubby, but with my b****y b***...
I never had these strictest rules since high school... and mind you, that was HIGHSCHOOL!!!
It makes me wanna resign already.

Rules that she's strict with us... but when she does it, she's good to go... tsk tsk tsk...
This is useless...

#RantRantRant

You're the Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me

bluewaves_aiz

07172013

Few hours more... and here we are... celebrating our 2nd year as lawfully wedded couple...

and I could not describe what I'm feeling as more fitting than this song...

"If anyone should ever write my life story

For whatever reason there might be

You'd be there between each line of pain and glory

'Cause you're the best thing that ever happened to me

You're the best thing that ever happened to me

Oh, there have been times when the times were so hard

But somehow, some way I'd made it through

And for every moment I've spent hurting

There's been moments spent loving you"

Happy anniversary hubby! Loveyousomuch :-*

Dreams without plan only exist in dreams

bluewaves_aiz

07092013

I had always been a futuristic kind of person, much of my same-age-peers can't really relate. That when I was in highschool, I'm thinking of college already. That when I was in college, I was thinking of how I'll work. And when I worked, I had this checklist of plans before and after I got married.

But some things happen that knock your plan out of your face. You stumble and you fall. But this post isn't about negativity. This post is about my dreams... that should have a plan

1. House and Lot - I've been thinking about this since I was in college. And now has become my biggest frustration. Not necessarily in a poshed subdivision. I just need it to be in metro, not flooded, and we'll build it ground up. 

2. Business - I'm thinking of a transport business, or a food-related business, or fashion-related goods. Should implement capitalist outlook.

3. Build wealth on my investments - Stocks investments and trading. Invest on knowledge and implement :)

4. Car - Not on my priority list as this depreciates value over time, but this is nice to have especially for Sky

5. Career - Be on deep ABAP or be a Logistics TechnoFunc. Have Implementation stint, and ABAP certification. Then also master android development for part time work. Cool, huh?

6. Overseas - Try Singapore :)

7. Migrate -in Australia, Canada or New Zealand. Only 2years waiting!!!

The sweetest revenge is success

bluewaves_aiz
10232012

To all my unsupportive, consistent detractors and back-stabbing friends... To my overtly imaginative malicious relatives who says they were concerned, but does the opposite act... To all those who criticized my family, I don't think I can let this go without telling you... Thank you.

I had never been good at confrontations, and clearing one's name, or even defending myself. I feel its too below my level, but then I again, people abuse it. I'm glad I stayed away from them, and maintained my composure at this things.

I don't account my success, or my happiness right now, to any of them, but I'd still wanna say thank you.

Maybe I need to translate this to tagalog, or even mention names para maintindihan niyo.

Salamat at nariyan kayo para pahinain ako, dahil kung kailan niyo ako pinahina, saka ako lumalakas. Ako'y nadaplisan niyo lang, kaya ngayon ako'y mas matapang. Subukan kong isa-isahin kayo

.MMVA: Buhay pa pala kayo? Matagal na kasi kayong patay sa puso ko... Ipagpatuloy niyo lang yan, baka sakaling diyan kayo sumaya.
.SJDP: The gossip queens. Oh, concerned pala kayo? Akala ko naghahanap lang kayo ng pwedeng pagkwentuhan sa telepono. I hope, I hope, na sana hindi mapatid ng inyong dila ang inyong pagasa. Oh well, never criticize my mom. Could you at least reflect on your actions? Please... Wag magmalinis. Hindi porke't nalagyan ng espasol ang mukha, malinis na. Tumingin sa pinanggalingan.
.FGFB: Maunfriend nga kayo sa facebook, maunfollow sa twitter, at masabitan nga sa likod ng "STAB ME BACK"
.wala na akong maisip.

Disclaimer: All of the characters here are fictional and exist only in black hole universe. The memory and imagination of the author is so vivid and factual that she hopes stone hits people when they read it.

Just a single note

bluewaves_aiz

04192013

I should work my ass off with the pile of tasks that I should finish by now.
But no.... this single note caught my attention, and now, I'm blown with emotions.

Maybe I'm over thinking again, but I don't know how can I ever erase, the feeling they made me feel.
When I was so down, they thumped me even more. Saying, "you're dead", "Don't call me **, I'm not your sister", etc. Goodness.... That's the love they know.
Oh, how can I ever forget the "wasteful" words they threw? The overrated stories they tell? And yes, that's because of "LOVE". I WANTEEDDD TOOO SCREEEEAAAAMMMMM!!!
I thought, this was all at the back of mind, in the abyss so I can never see any glimpse. But then, "it all came back to me".

No... I have beaten them all. And if not for the following persons, I may not have weathered the storm: to my Mom, though we have lots of disagreements and arguments, I really appreciated it when you were there to back me up and cry with me; to my ever dearest husband, who was stronger than I am; to my baby, Sky, that became my well of inspiration; and to my photobomber baby brother, who never judges, but always accepts... Thank you. This is my circle of trust.... They are the few who I consider my family. And just around them, I am happy...

So after this... I hope to erase those bad memories... and create happier memories with my circle of trust...