It's almost a YEAR

bluewaves_aiz
08112010

Parokya ni edgar's song playing in air, It reminds me that in less than 24 hours, we'll turn a year, since we formed this unbreakable bond. Congratulate me, I lasted a YEAR!

Not in my conscious mind do I plan to stay this long. But I did it. Before, 2months is enough. Now, lifetime is not even enough.

And I love him... repeatedly, I'll say this. Because whatever I do to drain this feeling. It just grows exponentially - so capacious that this single palpitating heart can't contain, that this mind can't apprehend, and this soul can't control...

I love JAH more than him, but I love him more than myself.

For so long, I hated girls who go gaga over boys. Through this relationship, I can empathize with them more. Not because I did what they did, but because, maybe... if I were in their situation, I'd feel the same.

Through this relationship, I learned how to fight for what I earnestly love, to be passionate, to pursue my dreams. For even if we're miles apart and storms separate us, the feeling just don't grow less. It really grows fonder. Cause I miss him badly. And this kills me.

Through this relationship, I learned how to give. Before, I always think that girls should be served. Now, I'm proud that I serve him. Relationship is not a competition of who loves more, who gives more, who sacrifices more. Because at the end of the day, when you love him, give him, sacrifice for him. It multiplies your happiness. And no reciprocation would match to that feeling. I can say, "Loving unconditionally is one of the best feelings".

Before, I demand for time, effort and care. Through this relationship, I became less demanding, well, slightly (hehe...). But I try my best to be satisfied with his efforts, to appreciate what he do than to look for other things. I'm now a more considerate person than I was before.

Through this relationship, I matured. Maybe some people will even negate this saying that I'm immature. But I can say this because I don't rush to decisions like a child. Love is no longer a distraction. It made me inspired. It makes me live like the air around me. It made me chaste after my dreams first before pursuing a lifetime with him. To prepare a solid foundation before pursuing a lifetime commitment.

Through this relationship, I learned how to persevere and to not give up easily. It made me use my mind - to be critical and creative in thinking. To decide out of the box options. To not give up, still, doing what is right.

HE completed my life. And if he's gone, a black hole is built in my heart - it sucks every positive emotions I have. Thank you for being there.

This relationship contributed another great thing - It made me ME right now - a STURDIER mariz. Thanks.